you and i

You sit there and you look so alone
you sit there and you laugh
but i know you do not mean it.
I see you in school, you don't mean to
but you act like you know it all.
But i heard you when you said you couldn't cope with the work
i heard you when you said you couldn't cope with emotions
just what can you cope with?
I feel for you because i know how it feels
to be abandoned, to be betrayed
We are so alike and yet so different.
We will never be apart. But we will never be together.

My advice

Do not give up.
It always gets better.
It doesn't matter if your best friend left you
Or the guy you like doesn't like you back
there will be other friends and other guys.
Just hold on through the pain.
I won't lie to you, you may never get over it.
But the pain does lessen over time.
i promise.

Moving on

I am happy
I am free
I have dignity's arms protecting me.
I have sweets
where you have lemons
I am moving on
and i can see
now i don't have your comments surrounding me
(short poem there about moving on, got a bit off track towards the lemons and sweets bit but oh well.)

Pain

Today my heart broke
Today i let myself get hurt again
It's time to put on the make up which masks my face
and cover up who i really am
It's time to put up the barbed wire around my heart
it's time to give everyone the stony glare
It's time to hide

My heart always reacted to heartbreak with immunity
today that power wore out
and I'm left standing in the rain
filled with nothing but the pain

Poetry of the damned

It's not fair.
I don't know who i am.
Why do i feel this way?
I'm never able to be myself. Not really.
There's always a piece locked away.
A secret i won't ever say.
A lie i'll never reveal.
I made a mistake. It cost me everything.
I'll never be the same again.
No one knows who i really am.
He thought he knew me, but he didn't.
She thought she saw me, but she didn't.
What they thought they knew and saw was a shadow of what was real.
Of what i really feel.
I'll never fit in. I'm an outsider. For that i thank God everyday!
Who wants to be cool when that includes getting drunk, smoking and screwing around?
But why does being an outsider have to be so hard?
I am different. More different than you know.
That's the point really... You will never know. Because i will never tell.

I drew this picture as i would have drawn it when i was five because i wanted it to remind me of my childhood - the one i didn't really have. Because i had to grow up so quickly and become a carer and deal with alot of crap. The writing reads "The inner child who is no longer innocent."

As of today...

As of today i have red hair, not brown
As of today i will have a stud in my lip
As of today i will have a deadly fierce look in my eyes
not the innocent one you're so used to seeing.
As of today you will no longer be the one i trust
As of today i cannot love but i must
for the old saying goes: It is better to have loved and lost
Than to have never loved at all.
Can i trust someone again or will it all come crumbling down
As of today i just won't care
As of today I'm just the guy with the stony glare

Hey y'all

This blog is where i'm gonna post anything creative. Enjoy!